Dar dar..or whoever you really are..I wonder sometimes, only cuz so many people introduce themselves to the forums, yet it’s always the same individuals who freepost and post the songs they’re listen’in to….it doesn’t matter cuz well..I’ve been drinkin’ and I’m tired of it, tired of feeling lousy and terrible and outta control. My dream..I think..was to attend university and obtain a master’s in education simply to work on the inside against the system type of thing to change the curriculum as the books and methods of teaching are so ****in’ behind that it just ends up destroying people..people who actually care so much that they come to a point where they can’t even hold the capacity for caring bout they own lives once they see the bigger picture of the world. I mean even if I go to university and finish what I set out to accomplish..in the end,,what difference what it really make? What difference it’s as if it’s a loosing battle, when we live in the now..we all get away with so much, than we realize that the now is something that reason fails to explain to the next individual that the now is what it’s all really about…..and that it destroys the very foundation of reason itself…and to quote my friend Timmy..”namely, the human being”..what next? Does Vanlandia attend school for the next 7-10 years and obtain a master’s in education against all odds? Does she carry on and do the best she is able to even though she knows that in the end it might only affect one person, and that person will or will not understand or be thankful for? I know and remember but at the same time I don’t..is how I ended up on the forum and how I opened up to Mister Xzibit…..he understands that bigger picture and as much as he trys to ignore me..we all know he cares as well and vanlandia has opened his eyes to the truth and even if reading between the lines is what it takes sometimes..
What does one do when if she’s in school, she focuses all her attention on school and not her son, than decides to stay at home to be a mom and isn’t happy with that and feels judged for that, and than wait’s until Luca is five years old to go back to what is termed as the “real world”, refresher course…huh..yeah, it’s as is if reality has struck a long time ago and vanlandia doesn’t know what to do with it. She understands and interprets though music and is forever grateful for it…however her reality is education and she’s actually extremely intelligent and has surpassed her own teacher’s and that’s what we need to work on…in quebec , the mentality is if she runs up o the pride of those actual teachers who already hold a degree in teaching they don’t accept the truth….well she ended up at home as a full time mommy and she ain’t happy with it. She’s judged for being a full time student, than judged for being a full time mom..She needs to get over it…and decide..she deciding to quit the booze and pills…it’s so difficult though…when you feel like you don’t belong but people understand you..it’s too bad all those people are musician’s. I can ramble on forever..but the point is…other’s never give up on their dreams and vanlandia did..and what happened? She turned into a hardore alkahoklik
Is it normal to speak in the third person? Why yes it is Vanlandia, that musta been a 60 ouncer talking.
Last edited by Vanlandia : 11-18-2009 at 08:56 AM.
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11-17-2009, 09:44 PM
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